Novella Submission Review 2.0

Hey all,
About a year ago, I left this novella, unfinished, on the board for review, and I realized I still had a lot to do. After some backlogging, procrastination, and eventual hard work, Bio has been completed. I'm looking for any more feedback I can get before submitting it for publication to a literary magazine, and please, don't hold back. My particular concern is the title, as I've been told it's kinda soft, so if you have any suggestions, please comment them! The link is below:

PFC Chamine

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